What makes us happy? Reflections on Long-Term Happiness

I would like to be happy. What makes us happy and what does the expression of “being happy” actually mean? And if there was a recipe for long-term happiness, what would it be?

What Does It Mean to Be Happy?

In my opinion, happiness is a feeling we experience when being relaxed. It is a moment when your thoughts dissolve, your mouth opens and occasionally we release spontaneous sound, such as a grunt which usually amuses those around us who are bored most of the time.

What Makes Us Happy?

Is it the presence of other people? The people with whom we can laugh while playing games together, doing activities together or sharing amusing stories but at the same time, they embrace us when we feel down, or fail and they are just there for us to hear out all our troubles.

Or, on the contrary, do we prefer to be alone somewhere in nature located in the middle of nowhere? In a place, where peaceful atmosphere reigns, fresh breeze strokes our cheeks, birds singing resonates in the background and sun’s rays pass through the trees and glitter like rays of happiness.

What about the moments when you are given a gift, a smile, or a compliment? And what about those when you are enjoying your favorite chocolate slowly melting on your tongue and your taste buds send a feeling of bliss to your whole body?

Is it the feeling that fills you when you help those in need or the moment when you are appreciated for good work? What about the feeling we experience in fulfilling our deepest desires?

Whether it is human contact, enjoyment of our favorite food, or charity, all these things have one thing in common. The feeling of happiness we experience is only temporary, and once it passes we so-called sober again.

Reflections on Long-Term Happiness

Let’s close our eyes and take a few deep breaths. Once you feel relaxed, think about the things that make you happy.

In this state of a clear mind try to think again. Imagine that what makes you happy is and always will be here. Imagine that all your deepest thoughts have been fulfilled and that you are living your dreams. Are you truly happy at this moment? And how long does this feeling last?

When I talked about this topic with my friends, I came to the point that people are mostly skeptical about happiness. In fact, we do not believe that there is a way to achieve happiness on a long-term base. What is your opinion on this? Do you think you can stay happy all day and every day?

I personally believe that it is possible.

Recipe for Happiness

There are plenty of recipes on how to achieve a happy and content life. Unfortunately, most of them are superficial and bring only temporary joy. I myself have to admit that my level of happiness is like a roller coaster that is full of uphills and downhills. However, the promising thing is that after a few rides, the moments in the heights above the valleys begin to prevail.

So what is the secret to achieve a long-term happiness? First of all, let’s return to my definition of happiness I mentioned at the beginning. Imagine that it is possible to achieve a state in which we feel constant happiness. I am not talking about laughing constantly. You know, laughter is demanding and after couples of minutes we, or at least I, start to get cramps in the cheeks.

“It is not happiness that makes us grateful. It’s gratefulness that makes us happy.”
David Steindl-Rast

One of the most beautiful recipes for happiness, which has addressed me the most in my several-year journey is being grateful.

Be Grateful

David Steindl-Rast shared with us in his speech at the TED Conference following words:

“Be grateful in every given moment for the opportunity.”
David Steindl-Rast

Every moment we experience is a gift, a new opportunity to do or change something. Let us be grateful for this opportunity. Let’s be grateful in our lives for all the ordinary little things that we have taken as a matter of course. Let us be grateful for each inhale and exhale, for having groceries in supermarkets, for drinking water running from the tap, for electricity supplying our homes and facilities, for the Internet, which allows us to connect with each other and share all our great knowledge and experience. And above all, being grateful that we are alive.

And what is so magical about this approach? Simply that it costs nothing us. We can always use this way, even though there seems to be nothing in the world for what it would be worth to live. Let us believe that if we stop and look closely around, we will certainly find a lot of things for which we can be grateful. And if we will practice this recipe regularly, who knows, for example, in a few months or years, we will achieve the dream of never-ending happiness.

This is the fourth article in the series:

The beginning of my journey